Sinners comes out on March 7th (161 days, but who’s counting?) and if you’ve seen the trailer, you can tell that this film is special, and I’m so crazy-excited to be a part of it. It’s the visionary Ryan Coogler and the incredible talent that is Michael B. Jordan in their 5th movie together. In line with their track record of killing everything they do, this film is no exception. And a huge shout out to Miles, Wunmi, Jayme, Omar, DelRoy, Lola, Jack, and Peter, my castmates who you’ll immediately fall in love with (if you haven’t already.)
I’ve been acting for 20 years (help, I’m still 12 in my brain) and consider myself extremely fortunate to have played a part in this movie, one that reminds me of why I wanted to start acting in the first place: to be a part of telling these complex, emotional stories that are so much bigger than me.
It’s funny, in the wake of this trailer dropping, it occurred to me that you might not know how I started acting in the first place. It’s a fun story, so buckle up.
My cousin was in a commercial…so I wanted to be in a commercial
When I was eight, I remember sitting cross-legged in front of our living room TV for hours. My cousin was in a commercial for some kind of doll and I was waiting for it. When she came on the screen (the TV was tiny but felt massive at the time), I ran into my parent’s room and told my mom I wanted to be in commercials. The previous week I had told her I wanted to play basketball and the week prior it was horseback riding. I had no idea what I wanted - I was eight, after all!
My mom understood what I didn’t then: that the price of entry in the entertainment industry was commitment. She was so supportive and ready to go, but she wasn’t about to throw me into something I thought I wanted without making sure I understood the challenges. She said, “If you take acting classes for a year and show me you’re serious, we’ll look into it further.”
I signed with an agency…but in the print division
I completed the year of classes and still wanted to act. The next step? Sending headshots to agencies in the hopes of getting a chance to audition. Of course, I didn’t have a headshot, so we had a photoshoot in the backyard.
We sent headshots to 10 top commercial, theatrical, and print agencies across L.A…and got 1 callback. I met with the agency and they sent me to their print division (so that’s ad campaigns and print publications). I started booking jobs. A year later, I got a call from the theatrical division of that same agency and they signed me.
During those years, from 9 to 12, it felt like my mom and I lived in the car going to auditions. Sometimes I’d have four auditions in one day. Halfway through 6th grade, the principal at my public school stopped signing my work permit (I was getting pulled out early often) and we decided to pivot to homeschooling. My parents always said school was the top priority for me and my brother, but let me tell you, my homeschooling experience was amazing and such a good fit! With a one-on-one tutor, school was about school, not what I wore or who I hung out with (but that’s for another newsletter).
Got my acting debut as…“Little Girl”
My first-ever acting job was on this mid-2000s sitcom called Back To You (sadly, short-lived). My official role was “little girl” (yeah, I’ll have my people call your people). But what’s memorable about that experience, besides it being my acting ~debut~, is that if you ask any actor how they got their SAG card they’ll be able to tell you because it’s a huge moment — and I got mine from playing that role!
Auditioned for True Grit…wearing a homemade burlap skirt
In 2009, the Coen brothers (the directors of True Grit) did a nationwide search to cast their Mattie Ross. There were rumors they’d already found their girl, but my agent said she’d let me know if anything changed. This was around Christmas time — and the industry goes quiet the last two weeks of the year — so we knew if they did call at the 11th hour, I had to be ready.
I took every single day for the next two weeks to work with my acting coach and study the material (it was online). Sure enough, the first Monday back from Christmas break, my agent called and said, “They want to see you. Can you go in tomorrow?” *Thank you, God.
You guys, the night before my audition, my mom ran out to Joann’s to get burlap fabric and made me a skirt. I borrowed one of her shirts that looked appropriate for the time period (to this day, I don’t know why she had a shirt suitable for the 1800s…). The next day, I walked onto the Paramount lot in my homemade costume for my first audition to read for the casting director, Ellen Chenoweth. Two weeks later, I got a callback to read for the Coen brothers. Three or four days later, I was on a plane to New Mexico.
I was 12, about to be 13, and it was my first everything: my first time away from home, my first time on a real movie set, and the first time I had live snakes thrown on me (they were well-trained and ice-cold). I owe so much to the people who made my first movie unforgettable, especially Joel and Ethan, who were such supportive and hands-on directors who got down in the dirt with me (Ryan Coogler is that kind of director, too). And my co-stars, Jeff, Matt, and Josh, may seem formidable, but on separate occasions, they’ve all given me the same advice that has guided me throughout my career: Don’t take life too seriously.
My Oscar nomination!
The morning I was nominated for Best Supporting Actress for my role in True Grit (nominations are announced at like 5 a.m. L.A. time), I woke up to my mom and dad screaming with excitement, they turned the TV announcement up loud, and my brother ran into my room with flowers. We drove straight to the Four Seasons where the cast was doing interviews. I ordered chocolate chip pancakes off the room service menu and then I remember the first reporter sat down and said: “Your title has changed forever, how do you feel?” But in my eyes, nothing had changed. I’d already won: I was in a movie!
Now, let’s talk about the night of the Oscars. You know when you watch the red carpet and there’s always one or two kids there walking the carpet? It’s so funny to me now, but that was me — I was the kid! Here are the highlights I remember from that night:
● The carpet was MASSIVE. I stepped out of the car and couldn’t believe how long it was.
● My whole family was there with me — my mom, dad, and brother — which was so special.
● I wore a custom Marchesa gown that I helped conceptualize: I told the stylist I was working with at the time what I wanted to wear (I think I even sketched it out). It was big, pink, beautiful, and felt timeless and special. I still have it.
● My mom and I were seated near the front by the stage. Mila Kunis was in the row in front of us. She turned around and asked my mom if she had any snacks lol (sadly she did not).
● I changed out of my heels and into red hightop Converse before the Vanity Fair party. My feet were killing me!
Reflecting on the start of my career, I’m incredibly grateful for every role I’ve had the privilege to play. From the early days to now, it’s been a whirlwind, and I can’t wait to share more details down the line. For now, I’ll bring back some buzz around the Sinners trailer — who knows, I might even get a few of my Sinners castmates on the newsletter to chat about it all. Stay tuned! See you next week x
Love,
Hailee (Beau)
